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Nozomi
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MM D3 - This... may not be the best place for this talk

Post by Nozomi »

Nozomi was walking along the village streets, coming to a stop there in the Market. Nobody was exactly there at the moment besides her companion, but that didn't mean that this wasn't a perfectly visible location. The feeling that she was constantly under observation, constantly being watched, it wasn't helping anything. She folded her arms in front of her and tapped her feet, turning to look at the only other person in easy hearing distance.

"You're doing this again, you know." Her eyes were narrowed. If looks could have killed, she would have been an Ono.
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Re: MM D3 - This... may not be the best place for this talk

Post by Shinsei »

There was a floaty kind of swivel as Shinsei's attention moved from...whatever it was he'd been focusing on before to the source of the voice, Nozomi. Beneath the hood, his face turned first one way, then the other, observing the empty streets around them before fixing his gaze back on her and pointing at himself as if to say "me?"
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Re: MM D3 - This... may not be the best place for this talk

Post by Nozomi »

Oh, those eyes rolled as he did that. Why did he always do that? He just turned her words on their head no matter how simple they were. There was a hint of a smile even if her foot tapping was getting worse and the eyebrow raise had a bit of a warning edge to it. "No, I was actually talking to the crow on your shoulder," she said a touch sardonically, the smirk fading afterwards.

"You're avoiding this. Again. You're going to have to stop, you know." Yup. Talking about it without actually saying what it is. Very helpful of her.
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Re: MM D3 - This... may not be the best place for this talk

Post by Shinsei »

A hand reached up as if to pet the non-present crow, only for Shinsei to tap himself on the shoulder in a brief moment of confusion. Not having the bird there was taking some getting used to.

"I apologize if my skills at evasion are so great that I've been avoiding something without meaning to. It has been a...very interesting...recent existence, let's say..."
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Re: MM D3 - This... may not be the best place for this talk

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She sighed in frustration, one hand moving to her hip. "There are days when I think you spoke with the Emperor's Brother with how gifted you are at it," she said with a rumbling murmur. "None of this changes the fact that you are attempting to shoulder all of this alone. Again. Like always."

"We both know how that usually ends. And I can't ride his sister this time if you do something foolish." Her eyes narrowed dangerously. "And whatever is happening? It has already begun. You don't think that they should know, do you? You don't need to shoulder this alone." And she didn't mean the Thunders as she said that.
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Re: MM D3 - This... may not be the best place for this talk

Post by Shinsei »

Shinsei closed his eyes at that, breathing in deeply and working his lower jaw as if to say something, but no words came from him. When his eyes opened, there was a small hint of sadness to them.

"Yes...trying to carry it all by myself will always result in disaster. I am...trying my best to...lessen the load, for myself and others, in the upcoming days. It has not...been easy for me."
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Re: MM D3 - This... may not be the best place for this talk

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Her expression softened a fraction, though she was still clearly annoyed... or perhaps worried. "The path is something you get to walk alone. Each of us do. This is not the path. This is destiny. That doesn't have to be walked alone. It can't." She grunted, knowing she was stating the obvious. "You realize that your constant need to shoulder the world's burdens is probably your biggest block in the path, just like my attachments are mine. Or so someone told me not long ago." She wasn't naming Mayumi. Not here.

"The dreams are getting worse. I haven't dreamed of falling in years. Are you sleeping well?" She had little doubt he could resist what she strongly felt was outside influence. She also had no doubt that he was being plagued by worse dreams. He tended to paint a target on himself.
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Re: MM D3 - This... may not be the best place for this talk

Post by Shinsei »

"Rest has been a significant challenge of late, I will admit. Moreso here than anywhere else, for obvious reasons." Shinsei reached a hand up and idly rubbed the side of his face, closing his eyes as he focused on breathing for a few moments.

"We cannot face destiny alone, that is very true, though one might suggest otherwise if they were so inclined." He looked to Nozomi's eyes, fixing his gaze on them. "I have tried to do what I can to make up for my faults. Tried to make preparations for what's to come. Yet I still did much of it on my own, leaving all those plans to bear the flaws of a single foolish man. It almost makes me laugh."
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Re: MM D3 - This... may not be the best place for this talk

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"It would shock the lot of them to hear that man be called foolish, but even the wisest has his moments," she said with a shake of her head. "Part of me thinks that you being more ... you than usual has the advantage of not drawing attention. Part of me, however, thinks that the threat we're dealing with today is not as subtle as other threats. Keeping things too quiet won't help. Not if it can see into our dreams."

It was a very veiled reference to the subject of the darkness, to the threat of even mentioning it. This time, Jigoku was not subtle enough that drawing attention was dangerous. All eyes were already on them.

"The thunders are going to handle themselves, one way or another. Before that moment, before you run off where I can't chase because we both know it isn't my destiny? At least let me try and help some."
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Re: MM D3 - This... may not be the best place for this talk

Post by Shinsei »

Shinsei's expression softened visibly, and he found himself nodding imperceptibly. "I am more than happy to accept your help, Nozomi. I am struggling in my search for how you might do so. Placing too much of my own burden on you is a burden in itself, after all."
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Re: MM D3 - This... may not be the best place for this talk

Post by Nozomi »

She nodded. "Knowing you are not alone is a help for one. But..." She frowned after a moment and then raised that eyebrow higher. "One of the others has asked something that I think might help you with that troublesome little task of finding ways to help. We both know that some of us aren't the nine, but fate still weighs heavily on us regardless. If our threat isn't as physical as it was all those years ago, is there a way that we can help them, and by helping them help you?"

Because helping the thunders certainly sounded like a good way to make his job easier.
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Re: MM D3 - This... may not be the best place for this talk

Post by Shinsei »

Shinsei was silent for a very long while, perhaps chewing harder on the words he was considering than any he had spoken before today. "It is no idle thing we are hoping to do here. Even I at my best struggle to truly comprehend the dangers that might befall the world if the thunders do not prevail, and I am not at my best, not right now..." Judging from the look on his face, that was a particularly bitter pill to swallow. "How far you can go to support the thunders, versus how far you are willing to go... How far can any of us go? Limits start to lose meaning in the realm of dreams, and there's no telling which limits might be the ones tested." A pause. "I know you have faced your own fears. If you were to give voice to how that felt, right here and now, what would you say?"
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Re: MM D3 - This... may not be the best place for this talk

Post by Nozomi »

She nodded at first, considering his words. At least he was able to admit he wasn't at his best. That was something of a first under the circumstances. She was not sure it was wise to be reassured by that fact, but there she was. Folding her arms again, she considered the question. "How far I would go? Pffft. I think we both know that I have to be held back as much as some people I know." That would be a very honest statement, wouldn't it?

"As for my fears? It nearly destroyed me. You might remember that from back then. I was guided by my terrors, and I still struggle with them constantly. Those fears are why I didn't go into Jigoku, more than anything else. You saw them in me." She breathed in and out before sighing. "But by now, I would say that they're old, familiar haunts. I know them well. They plague me constantly. Another day of those fears is just part of my life now. Fear can drive you, but you can't let it rule you."
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Re: MM D3 - This... may not be the best place for this talk

Post by Shinsei »

A nod in return. "You looked into the mouth of Jigoku, when it still held sway over the earth, and you turned away knowing what it might do to you." Shinsei turned, eyes focused but still somehow distant. "But the you of right now knows what the you of then was feeling, and you know what you might say to yourself if you were given the chance. What would you say?" He sighed heavily. "Now consider...how those words might direct others who were staring down the same vile gullet, what they might have to bear witness to. What would you say to them?"
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Re: MM D3 - This... may not be the best place for this talk

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She frowned. It deepened. "I probably would have told her that she was deluded by dreams of finding a place in a changing world, when she already had one. I'd also tell her that dwelling on her fears only gave them power. The more she feared them, the more they ruled her. Accepting them helped a lot. They simply are what they are." Could that be shared?

"I could offer something tomorrow perhaps. It might help. A teaching moment."
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Re: MM D3 - This... may not be the best place for this talk

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Shinsei nodded a little more vigorously now. "I think that may be wise. This is new ground, we are all of us heading down paths we have no knowledge of. The best we might be able to offer is guidance on where we could go based on where we've been before. It..." He stopped speaking for a moment, and even seemed to forget your he was going to finish that thought. "It may be all that we get to prepare us."
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Re: MM D3 - This... may not be the best place for this talk

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That pause was ... a little unexpected, but he'd been distracted lately. Almost certainly there were one too many directions to think about at once. It couldn't be easy, though it worried her a little. "I might incorporate the little game that I used to use. I did it in the winter court just to make all those flapping jaws shut up, but it could also help them. Meditation could be pivotal going forward. It certainly won't hurt."
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Re: MM D3 - This... may not be the best place for this talk

Post by Shinsei »

"Only division could..." He shook his head at our to clear hood thoughts. "Clarity of mind, focus purpose. These will be the tools." He nodded again. "Despite my efforts, I know of no further advice I could offer. Even having everyone here was...poorly thought out. With no clear plan, I fear for the future."
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Re: MM D3 - This... may not be the best place for this talk

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She shrugged. "We don't know how the forces are going to approach us. I suspect, had things been different it would have been much more straightforward." She looked out towards the mists and her lips thinned. "I wonder if anything would even come and attack. This may very well be entirely a battle in our minds. You might be right that we didn't need to bring everyone here. Then again..." She pondered.

"One of the tricks I learned from you might be helpful to them if I find them in a trance or sleep and in need. It can breathe resolve in. But the timing is the trick."
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Re: MM D3 - This... may not be the best place for this talk

Post by Shinsei »

Shinsei was silent for a long moment before speaking. "It may be important in extreme cases... Though it may suppress something they need to work out for themselves. If you're right and this is to be a battle in our minds, they will need to be as focused as they can." He should his head. "I... can't say what form the battle will take. Everything here is unclear."
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