The Day of Thunder

[Ukyou]

1. A stick.
2. Another stick.
3. Hoto-Hori shouting "Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu . . . " at maximum volume.

1. Steal something shiny from your love interest and reflect the stars in it.
2. Set something on fire. Fire is shiny! Preferably something of theirs.
3. Tap a shiny thing against an even shiner thing. Especially if they're not yours. Improves the sound quality.

[Jiyo Sora]

Doji Hikaru has been chosen and given three quests to complete, to show his spirit, heart, and soul, to be worthy for marriage. He must show his completion of these tasks within four days.

First, he must hold the stars in the palm of his hand.
Second, he must show the strength of fire.
Third and lastly, he must create the most sublime sound.

Evil Uncle Chaperone Powers Activate



I SUMMON THE COUNCIL OF OLD STICKS IN THE MUD.

Lady Anjing shall have first watch, I shall take second, and Lady Makime shall have third.

And we will all be armed.

[Ryoshun Yukara]

hold some fireworks.
Shoot those fireworks.
See above.

???

Profit.

[Anjing]

Evil Uncle Chaperone Powers Activate



I SUMMON THE COUNCIL OF OLD STICKS IN THE MUD.

Lady Anjing shall have first watch, I shall take second, and Lady Makime shall have third.

And we will all be armed.

We shall chaperone in the village, we shall chaperone in camp and on farmland, we shall chaperone at the festival, we shall chaperone at even the most inconvenient moments, and we shall never remove our sticks from the mud.

[Otomo Akutou]

Makes me glad I'm not on the market.

[Ryoshun Yukara]

And in the years to come, they will say this was their chaste-est hour.

[Jiyo Sora]

We shall chaperone in the village, we shall chaperone in camp and on farmland, we shall chaperone at the festival, we shall chaperone at even the most inconvenient moments, and we shall never remove our sticks from the mud.

So swears the Codger Compact

[Akodo Kenji]

And this is how the old codgers got to knocking boots late at night.

[Jiyo Sora]

And this is how the old codgers got to knocking boots late at night.

Do want to be incinerated by the sheer intensity of Makime's glare?

Because that's how you get incinerated by the sheer intensity of Lady Makime's glare.

(Plus if you even hint to Sora that he might cheat on his wife, he will do Very Bad Things to you involving leeches, rock salt, and rusty knives)

[Akodo Kenji]

Hey!

I'm not the one making pacts with women when I'm already promised to another!

[Jiyo Sora]

I see the leeches, rock salt, and rusty knives will also need to be accompanied by my singing.

[Akodo Kenji]

You add in the singing, and I might start to think you're interested in courting me too.

[Jiyo Sora]

Otaku clicks her tongue and sends Tsubame into a charge at the smaller wolf. She aims a sword cut at the big one in passing, but it glances harmlessly off the heavy slime-slicked coat--never mind that, as Tsubame's charge carries the weight of both armored horse and rider down on the guard wolf. They trample clean over it and keep going a few feet further before Tsubame sheds enough momentum to turn back to the fight.

A few universes over, Yogo Junzo winces in sympathy.

[Akodo Kenji]

*looks at Sora's nightmare roll*

I see the Shochu worked.

[Jiyo Sora]

I'm going to bask in that number because it's never happening again


EDIT:

And I love everything about this:

[Otomo Akutou]

I'm in this image, and I don't like it.

[Kaijarisuigyo]

Eh. My personal favorite so far is Clouded by Thoughts, mostly because this is the only card where I feel like there's an actual flavor/illustration/effect synergy without the various texts being one million words each. Brevity is the soul of wit.

My second favorite is Sleep Deprived Madness, that's almost there, but not exactly.

[Jiyo Sora]

Insufficient Godzilla, can only award a silver medal at best.

[Otomo Akutou]

Insufficient Godzilla, can only award a silver medal at best.

Purposeful grimace -or- terrible sound, but not both?

[Bakuriel]

Insufficient Godzilla, can only award a silver medal at best.

Purposeful grimace -or- terrible sound, but not both?

Mayhaps it's the helpless people on a subway train screaming "my god" as he looks in on them?